Florilegium ¹

I would like to thank my mentors, Steven Dunn and Helen Rubinstein, for their work in helping me grow as a writer as I worked to bring this thesis to fruition, as well as Rachel Swearingen, Keith Lesmeister, and Jennifer Colville for their assistance with residencies. Additionally, the students of the Cornell College Master of Fine Arts program deserve endless gratitude for their feedback: Angie Miller, Lenore Maybaum, Andrea Wilson, Sue Sasek, Meghan Kuhn, and Paul Watkins.

This work would not be possible without the tireless assistance of my partners, Dave, Echo, JD, Jay, Justin, and Robin. In addition, my dogs and cat, past and present, played a major role not only in the first chapter in this work, but also in keeping me going: Falcon, Turtle, and Zephyr, all of whom passed as I wrote these works, and Judith who lives on.

Finally, this work is dedicated to Dwale, of blessed memory.

A florilegium is a collection of quotations, references, and other materials built by an individual to maintain a sense of who they are. As part of the commonplacing tradition, these are intended to collect knowledge into a book for personal reference.

In this thesis, this concept is used to explore the amount of space that one feels permitted to take up in the world. Information is collected and, at first, used as a literary exploration while a parallel personal story is told, using the smaller text of footnotes to minimize the amount of space that the author takes up on the page in a literal sense.

In the second part, the concrete information and parallel story are given equal treatment on the page as the author strives to allow themselves to take up more space in the world, exploring various transitions in life while justifying their experience through academic writing.

In the third and final part, the dichotomy is broken and the knowledge provided by these quotations and references becomes an anxious plea that is integral to the author’s struggle to justify a plural existence.